My silly issue…
led to a powerful self-reflection.
I’m going to admit a silly, and maybe even bizarre flaw I have. I’m a little embarrassed to tell you this, but it’s so true. I seriously... I mean desperately... try to avoid ordering pizza. Weird. I know! Now, I can do Bite Squad. I can hop on to my certain restaurants and order the same thing because it’s fast and effective. But ordering pizza always seems to take a ridiculous amount of time and is never simple. I have to navigate through all the specials, close windows that pop up and usually it’s ordering for a lot of people so I’m managing several combinations of toppings. I just don’t like it... I really, really don’t like it.
Recently, the “ordering of the pizza” fell on me and there was no one else to pass it off to. Believe me, I tried. I even texted Paul while he was working and asked him to do it! Obviously he said… “uh, no.” So I proceeded with a little encouraging self talk and got online. I navigated through the options, closed all the pop up windows, found the combinations my guests wanted, entered in my credit card info, clicked “order”, and nothing. Clicked order again... nothing. I refreshed, entered in my card info again, clicked one more time, nada. Then it happens… I don’t know what comes over me! In other moments I can juggle three rowdy boys while making a business phone call and pulling food out of the oven. But ordering pizza gets me every time!
I took a deep breath and then called my local franchise. I asked them if I had just placed the same order five times. Well, this pizza guy was not in the best of moods. He said the stores aren’t connected to the online ordering system and he can’t help me. It was obvious he didn’t want to deal with my issue. I’m sure he was thinking something like, “Lady, place a new order or hang up.”
I hung up.
Well, this is when I did something I regretted. Being as how I never respond to people with frustration, and my tone of voice on the phone was perfectly kind, I decided this franchisee needed a bad review. If he wouldn’t listen to my problem then, I would make him listen... and everyone else too. I hopped onto Yelp and wrote something like... “the brand IS connected to your store. Just pretend you care and help me find someone to check my credit card.”
The immediate feeling that came over me was justification; but that was quickly followed by a feeling of guilt. I paced, I stalled... then I edited the review. Maybe if I take out this last line it will be not so bratty? Edit number one. Paced, stalled some more... ok, maybe I’ll change this word and that will make it ok. Edit number two. Paced again. This continued on and on and on. For hours I was tormented! Later that night I finally just deleted the review.
You can laugh at me. It’s fine. I know it’s ridiculous that ordering pizza causes me such turmoil, but it did get me thinking. Did I write this negative review to help or hurt? Do you write negative reviews? I have to assume we do this because we want to feel heard. Our service or experience didn’t give us the treatment we felt like we deserved and someone should know about it. But, does that make it ok? Have each of us reacted or responded to someone in a way we regret? I know I have.
There’s a verse I read recently that really has really stuck with me. “Out of the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.” After reading this verse, I asked myself… is everything I say either a blessing OR a curse?
Think about that. What we say, text, or post is one or the other... a blessing OR a curse? What if there is no in between?
If I’m trying to speak the Blessing to those who are special in my life, is there ever an appropriate time to speak a curse? Leaving a bad review isn’t a huge offense, I understand that. But it made me think through my daily conversations from the perspective of “there’s no in between”. Scary to think about it, isn’t it?
Our son Brasher just recently turned eight years old. We did his birthday Blessing and so many beautiful things were said to him. Later that night, after the party, Paul told Brasher there was something else he wanted to tell him. He said, “Brasher, I see something in you that I am very proud of. There is a verse that says, ‘be quick to listen and slow to speak.’ You do this Brasher and that shows great wisdom.”
Not being able to order pizza calmly may always remain a flaw of mine, but I cannot allow the most powerful tool I have been given to be used as a weapon, no matter what the circumstance. I want to be quick to listen and slow to speak. And when I do speak, I want to make sure it’s a blessing, even in the simplest of conversations and interactions.... with my family, my friends, with acquiantances in passing, and even with the pizza guy.